


like jack loves rose

by asexuelf



Category: Sally Face (Video Games)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Cults, M/M, Movie Night, Pining, Sal Fisher Has Low Self-Esteem, Scars, Self-Harm, So Much Laughter, Travis Joins The Sally Face Gang, no one chuckles or chortles in my good christian home, take a shot every time you see the word laugh
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-04
Updated: 2020-01-04
Packaged: 2021-02-27 12:47:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,345
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22107319
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/asexuelf/pseuds/asexuelf
Summary: Sal doesn't think he'll ever be worthy of love, let alone Travis' love.
Relationships: Sal Fisher/Travis Phelps
Comments: 22
Kudos: 74





	like jack loves rose

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Babs562](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Babs562/gifts).



> im not sure this warning is needed anymore, but this technically contains spoilers for episode 5...? technically?
> 
> for background: travis and sal are still in high school and are friends post-episode 3. they're aware of the cult and kenneth phelps' involvement, because travis' dad moved them around to follow sal (prophecy reasons). travis still stays with his dad for information on the cult and is essentially the gang's "man on the inside".
> 
> this barely comes up but i realized towards the end it didnt make much sense without context akdhskfjs
> 
> ANYWAYS. THANKS TO @Babs562 (I THINK? I HOPE I GOT THE RIGHT PERSON AKDJSK) FOR THE REQUEST. the request was a scene based off of the line "do you think anyone will ever love me like they love each other?" from episode 5... sorry it took this long!
> 
> i hope ya'll enjoy!

Sal has never cared much for romance movies.

It's not that he dislikes them; he loves cheesy, romantic things. The more dramatic they are, the better, too. When Gizmo watches his soaps, Sal is usually right next to him, slumped lazily into the cushions next to his kitty, just as hypnotized by what's on the screen.

He finds it leaves him with a bad aftertaste, though. Like drinking too much Jolt makes his head hurt, watching too many romcoms makes his heart ache. It's silly to be so heartbroken over it, but when he sees those people fall into each other and laugh, it starts to feel like a reminder: _you'll never have a love like that._

He wants a love like that.

He wants that school dance, high school sweethearts, meetcute kind of love. He wants that groundhog day, do whatever it takes, destiny kind of love. He dreams about it sometimes, only to wake and catch sight of his uncovered face in the mirror. Looking into his eyes, one haunted and one missing, he knows the closest thing to love he'll ever know is Phantom of the Opera. All he can ever hope to be is Erik, deformed and unwanted, or Quasimodo, longing for someone who will never long in return.

It hurts. He can't help it.

With a sigh that shakes his chest, Sal turns off the TV, ignoring Gizmo's meows of protest. He yowls passionately for the return of his show, and for good reason - Esperanza just woke from her coma, so she and Angel were just about to kiss out a happy reunion. Three entire seasons of Angel gazing longingly at a sleeping Esperanza, all leading up to this moment! Right now, though, Sal knows he wouldn't be able to cope with that. Not the smiles, not the tears, not the touched look on the nurses faces… 

Every time he's ever woken up in a hospital, he's woken up alone. That won't be changing any time soon.

"Sorry, buddy," he murmurs. "How about we watch Star Trek instead?"

Gizmo sighs, but doesn't make any more sounds of discontent. He just lies his head on Sal's lap, grumpily kneading his claws through his human's jeans.

-

Although he can change his cat's favorite TV show, he can't do much about his friends' watching habits.

"I love this movie," Travis enthuses. He stuffs the VHS into the VCR, coming to sit next to Sal while it rewinds.

"I know it's a chickflick or whatever," he continues. "But that doesn't really matter with you. I feel freer when I'm with you, like I can just do whatever."

Sal blinks, pleased and surprised. His friends tell him that often, but it always makes him feel good to hear it.

Travis is sitting on his good side, so he can see the way his expression goes from carefree to embarrassed. The poor guy is so easily spooked when it comes to the topic of shame...

"I'm glad," Sal says hurriedly. "I want you to feel that way."

Though his smile returns slowly, Travis meets his eyes, relief clear in them. "Oh. Cool." He presses his shoulder flush against Sal's. "I'm glad. I hope you feel that way with me too."

In some ways, yes… Sal feels free to do and say nearly anything he likes. Travis isn't as judgemental as people might assume; in reality, he's just naive and easily frightened. He doesn't want to be an outlier or a freak - but he also hates conformity. It makes him an easily frustrated sort of guy, but it also makes him a kind one, when he allows himself to be.

That's just some of the many reasons why, in other ways, Sal feels more trapped than ever in his own body, locked behind his own gruesome face. Travis has quickly become one of his closest friends, worming his way further and further into Sal's heart with every second spent together. Feeling the warmth of Travis' body against his through their shirt sleeves, Sal is only pulled further into the deep well of his affection. The well has become so deep without his realizing it, he doesn't think he'll ever be able to climb out. He doesn't think he even wants to.

He wants to pull Travis into this well with him. He wants to build it into a beautifully sculpted fountain, present the waters of his affection for everyone to see.

With a sigh, Sal allows himself to lay his head on Travis' shoulder. Travis presses his cheek against Sal's hair with a happy noise before pulling away.

"Mind if I make popcorn?"

Travis isn't free to do a lot at home, so when he's at Sal's, he loves to make the snacks. Sal's never seen anyone else get so excited about making ants on a log.

"Go ahead," Sal says. "I'll keep an eye on the tape."

"Cool beans!"

Travis leaps up, leaving Sal with a friendly shoulder squeeze.

When he's gone, Sal lays back and sighs. How can an evening with someone be both torturous and delightful? How can an awesome time with his friend be so great and yet suck all at once?

Sal glares at the VHS cover. It's a romance movie from a few years ago, with a sticker on the front telling him it's rented. He'll have to remember to be kind and rewind, assuming he survives the entire 140 minutes.

_Way to go, Quasimodo. You'll sit here and pine like an idiot and then when Travis finds his guy, you'll be the one ringing the church bells._

Travis comes back with a big bowl of popcorn, sodas balanced under his arms, and a smile stuck to his face. "Ready?"

"As I'll ever be."

"What?" His leg is warm against Sal's, his laugh musical in Sal's ears.

"Nothing. I'm excited to see this movie you like so much."

Travis leans forwards, stretching his arm out to press play, before leaning back against Sal. "Oh, you stopped before the previews all got rewound. Smart!"

"I'm an expert rewinder."

"Obviously. Ever thought of going pro?"

Sal chuckles. "Future CEO of Blockbuster right here. You heard it first."

Travis snorts, his little gremlin cackle hidden under his breath. The sound makes Sal's heart seize. It's just so damn cute!

Grabbing a blanket, Travis curls up beneath it, then moves to cover Sal with it too. He's so careful to make sure the blanket is evenly distributed between them, looking down intensely at their laps. The movie has barely even started and already, Sal is at maximum capacity. He can't handle anymore. 

It doesn't help that Travis is wearing his pajamas, an ensemble that includes a warm long-sleeve shirt and athletically short shorts, with thick socks to keep his feet warm. He's smiley and leaning against Sal without a care in the world. Before long, he becomes completely sucked into the movie, only stopping to point out his favorite parts.

It's just too much. If Travis weren't so warm and comfortable laid against him, he'd get up and feign a potty break. Instead, he closes his eyes and imagines himself in a world where he's as handsome as the romantic interest in the movie. He imagines he's worthy of the guy next to him.

"This part always gets me," Travis whispers.

Sal opens his eyes again. On the screen, the characters are crying, staring into each other's eyes like nothing else exists. This is the part after the Big Misunderstanding that's always in these movies, Sal thinks, because they're talking about how much they care about each other, about what crazy things they'd do and how much they'd sacrifice to make the other happy.

"Do you think…" Sal turns in shock at the wet quality of Travis' voice. He clears his throat, but he can't hide his teary eyes. "Do you think anyone will ever love me like that?"

He can't believe his ears. "Why wouldn't they? You're amazing, Travis!"

Travis laughs, but the sound is missing the joy of his earlier laughter. He looks so sad, suddenly. "Well- Just _look_."

And then he pulls up his sleeve. Sal's first though is, _I've never seen his bare arms before._ His second is, _Holy fucking shit_.

Travis' arm is covered, front-back-and-sideways, wrist to elbow, in scars. Sal can tell from experience that they're self-inflicted. They overlap so much that some parts of his arm are very nearly only scar. If he pulled up his sleeve to his shoulder, Sal is afraid there'd be more. The thought of Travis hurting himself breaks his heart in a way it's never been before.

"Travis, oh my God…"

Travis doesn't pull down his sleeve. He just stares miserably at the scars he's dug into his skin. "The other arm is exactly the same. I'm so fucking broken, Sal. Who's going to want this?"

"There's so much about you worth wanting. You're so caring and you're so brave… If someone thinks less of you because of this-" He grabs hold of Travis hand, presents Travis' scars to them both. "Evidence that you've survived… Then they aren't worthy of you."

Travis stares at him in shock. His watery eyes spill over. "Oh. Thank you."

Impulsively, Sal tugs at his own hair. "Actually…" And then he's taking off his mask. His hands fiddle with the straps at the same time his brain screams _don't do it don't do it don't do it_ -

Travis stares. He soaks in every piece of Sal's face. He looks… not disgusted. There's no horror on his face at all. He doesn't give Sal's face the same terrified, miserable look that the mirror does. Like Ash, like Larry, all there is is interest and care.

"Wow," Travis whispers. "This is your face." And then he's touching him, shocking Sal into flinching. He'd snuck up on his blind spot. Travis doesn't stop touching him. "Hi, Sally Face."

Sal huffs. "Hi, yourself." He closes his hand gently around Travis' wrist, stopping his wandering fingers. His touch is too much. "I'm just- I understand. Every time I watch something like this… I wonder if I'll ever know that kind of happiness."

"I want you to."

"Me too. But it all looks like dead ends to me-"

"No, Sal. I mean, _I want you._ "

And then he's being kissed. The left side of his face is mostly numb, more scarred flesh than tender skin, but he can feel it still - Travis' mouth is warm and wet and far too timid. 

Sal leans forward. He puts his other hand on the back of Travis' neck, holding him there. He closes his eyes.

 _This isn't real_ , he thinks. _The Phantom dies in the opera house. This is just a fantasy._

But when he opens his eyes, Travis is still there. Still real. His eyes are closed too, lips slightly parted. He's breathing a little too quickly, his breath hot against Sal's face.

"Do you mean it?"

Travis opens his eyes slowly, cat-like and lethargic. "What?"

"Do you- Is it even possible for you to want me?"

That brings Travis back to the present. He blinks and pulls back as far as Sal's hand will allow - which isn't far. Despite wanting to give Travis the freedom to move and pull away, Sal finds he can't quite let go of him just yet.

"Of course I mean it…" Travis squeezes a hand up between them to rub at his still-wet cheeks. "You think after all the bullshit I've gone through, I'd make a _funny_ about being gay for you?"

Sal huffs out a laugh again. His hand slides easily down Travis' neck to fall in his lap. Travis takes it in his own without a thought. "No, I guess you wouldn't. I'm just… You can see me. You see my face."

"I've seen them both. Technically, I made you a third one with Larry, but you don't wear it."

"Heh, yeah… Sorry about tha-"

Travis kisses him again. "Shut up. I don't care what face you have on, I wanna look at it forever. Stupidass."

"Okay." Sal grins wider than he can remember. It hurts a little, his face unused to the stretch. 

Travis can't kiss his mouth while he's smiling, but that doesn't stop him trying. He kisses every part of Sal's face, chasing him even as he squirms away. "Stay still. I'm kissing you until you stop being a stupidass."

Sal laughs. It sounds hysterical. His face is disgusting - how can Travis sit there and put his mouth all over it without even flinching? 

"Stop!" He stops thinking, forcing the disgust he feels towards himself out of his mind. "Let me calm down so we can kiss better."

"You're already dissing my kissing technique?"

Sal laughs again, shaking with it. "No, no! You're so great. You're amazing." He presses his forehead tightly against Travis'. "You're so amazing. You really want me?"

"I just said yes… I've literally been crushing on you since like, 4th grade." His forehead drags against Sal's, his lips suddenly soft and searching beside his nose. "You're so fucking oblivious."

"I keep forgetting you moved from Jersey the same time I did."

"Cultist father. Ancient prophecy. Y'know."

"God, our lives are so fucked up. Can we make out?"

More laughter follows. There's so much laughter, Sal can hardly believe it. He's so damn happy.

"Are you going to be one of those guys?" Travis crawls into his lap, wrapping the blanket firmly around them both. "I'm not complaining, it's just hilarious."

"I'm still convinced I'm dreaming," he admits. Travis scoffs, but he continues, "It'll pass and I'll be normal again. Maybe."

Travis grins against his mouth. "Take your time."

"I might have to."

It's no Esperanza and Angel, but it's not Erik and Christine either. And it doesn't need to be anything other than Sal and Travis, he realizes. It's their own love story. Their own unfathomable, friends to more than friends, ancient prophecy, 'til the end of the world romance.

They don't stop kissing until the VCR spits out the tape.

**Author's Note:**

> THANKS FOR READING!!! 💖
> 
> sorry if i'm wrong about erik dying in the opera house btw. i've only ever seen the movie version of phantom and i was delirious with fever at the time akdnskd


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